Saturday, July 31, 2010

look, she's back

Dear world,

I am now living a life that is, in its barest frame, the one that I pictured a couple years ago when I first thought of moving away. As tends to happen in life, though, the intervening time has filled in the details that frame holds up, and life is in the details, isn't it? Let me share some of the things I have learned over the past two years.

  1. There are some slights that you will never forget, even if they happened a long time ago and you thought you had forgotten them.
  2. You have to forgive those things anyway, or else they'll shadow other parts of your life, and there's just no reason to let them.
  3. Sometimes, in relationships (with anyone), you have to let go of small things to make it work. But small signs of big things should never be ignored.
  4. Having the time to do things makes very little difference if you don't actually get up and do them.
  5. Loneliness is not something you can run away from. Oddly enough, you end up still being lonely.
  6. The people who love you are probably not going to be as quick to judge you as you fear.
  7. Some of them (not all) will judge you anyway, even if they try not to let it show.
  8. They still love you, and that's more important.

None of these are lessons perfectly learned, of course. They're in that category of things that need to be learned repeatedly throughout life. Still, they sum things up pretty well - and I'm working on them.


meagan said...

Hi. :-)

You are still being read by people far away who don't talk with you nearly enough.

Just so you know... :-)

meagan said...

And I mean that in the most positive light.

I'm just awkward, haha.

Crystal said...

i <3 ruthann! something about your post made me think that, so i figured i'd post it for the world (or maybe just meagan?) to see.

Ruthann said...

Probably just Meagan... haha. :) But the sentiment is much appreciated. :)

Sara said...

And me! A few months late, but I love all three of you, and thought about it while I read this post and comments too :)